When we begin to acknowledge our addictions and allow ourselves to explore the totality and the depths of the causes of our addictions, we are in a state of exploration and transformation. Moving beyond the focus of our situation and battle/ duality state with our addictions empowers us to confront and bring into our awareness where we are feeling dis-empowered, or in a perceived state of weakness. This feeling of weakness is the soul yearning for reconnection and completeness within itself. Solidarity: unification within the self. Unification of the mind, body and soul. Realigning ourselves so that our actions and daily drives and desires are allowed to come back into a state of balance and become a reflection of unification of the mind, body and soul.
While moving through this state of self discovery it is important for us to take the “battle element” out of this growing awareness. Understanding and gaining clarity on the causes and the depths of our addictions doesn’t have to put us in a state of overwhelm and burden unless we are allowing it to. Instead it is more empowering to bring an attitude of gratitude for our expanding understanding as well as an acknowledgement that we are already moving beyond the addiction. Too much focus has been placed on the idea of struggle and that recovery is somewhere off in the distant future, or that we will never reach this place of empowerment and trust within ourselves. Instead we need to bring the focus back to the present as this is the only place of power. Even if we haven’t acted on an addiction for a short duration of time, if we know that we have already changed a pattern of behaviour, then let’s celebrate the fact. If we have already moved beyond our usual cycle of engagement in an expression of our addiction, let’s celebrate the fact. Let’s honour and acknowledge that we are already moving into that state of alignment and growth where we have allowed conscious awareness of our actions to change the course of our engagement in our personal addictions.
This is the place of constance that we are surrendering ourselves to come back into. It it not a state of striving to reach, but a state reached through surrender. It is not about ‘trying’. It is a surrendering of the duality state of separation, anxiety, addiction, craving, struggle and into a remembrance of our divinity within this individual moment. Remembering this state of being and allowing ourselves to come back into this place of acknowledgement no matter how often we ‘fall off the horse’ and where we ‘perceive ourselves to be in our state of recovery’. Understand that just the pereception of where we think we are in our recovery can actually be hindering us from allowing ourselves to feel reconnected in this moment.
The serenity prayer
The serenity prayer, or variations of the serenity prayer used in recovery groups, is an acknowledgement of being in this moment:
“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”
For those who don’t believe in “God” or dislike using the word “God”, or have mixed feelings about using the word “God”, perhaps out of a sense of religious connotation, or personal confliction over how to define “God”, change the wording. Use “true self”, “higher self”, “universe”, “Goddess”, “Spirit”, “All that exists”, “the totality of my being”. Whatever wording you can think of that supports you, resonates with you, feels comfortable to you and that you can use as anchor. If the idea of any type of God / energy just feels too conflicted for you then use “the strength within me” or “the perfection within me”
For those who don’t like the idea of prayer, again as it may bring conflicted feelings or the connotation of religion, then change it to the serenity affirmation. The idea is to use this wording as an invocation to bring yourself back into realignment in this now moment.
The first line, “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change” is an acknowledgement of surrender. A pause or a reflection in the moment in order to release our personal crazy. To just say “in this moment I am releasing the fight within me”. Surrender is not about giving up and going back into the actions spurred by addiction, but a surrendering of the supressive states of addction we engage in, that cover up what needs to be healed.
The second line: “courage to change the things I can” is a call to action. This is a call to responsibility and taking the acknowledgement of our addictive behaviours and placing a framework that works in our favour to move out of habitual addictive patterns. This is an owning up to ourselves. The action principle of change where we review what we are doing in our lives and make a decision of what we are going to discard and what new patterns of behaviour and modes of operation we are going to bring into our lives.
The third line: “wisdom to know the difference” is about a realignment of the ego self. It is a calling in for improved clarity. The understanding of what we wish to keep, and what we wish to discard depending on where we feel we are at this moment of our lives. And the point is that this can change and is allowed to change. Because down the track there may be other things we are ready to discard but that may not be a reflection of where we are in our evolution at this moment. The whole point of the prayer is to allow our process to work for us, not against us. Not to create further struggle, but to provide structure and clarity and a process that empowers us right now in this moment.
You can connect with him at http://thedisconnecthealingspace.com